Only Days Away from Officially Finalizing!

The days are ticking down now. After today, just 23 days left until Penny officially becomes a Regan and an American citizen. Don't believe the Americans at the airport who tell you your child receives citizenship upon touching down on American soil. It simply does not apply in the case where you have not already finalized overseas. Of course, Thailand is one of those countries where you must finalize in the U.S. We are very fortunate that our Colorado state agency that wrote up our homestudy is moving everything along quickly. We will finalize just a week after our third post-placement is due for Thailand. That third post-placement visit takes place the morning of Penny's 14th birthday, next Wednesday. Then on June 23rd we will go to a court in Denver for the finalization procedures. The weeks, months and years of waiting and hoping that we don't do anything "wrong" to mess up the adoption will finally be over. Birth parents don't go through this agonizing feeling of wondering, "Do I measure up?" "Will they ever want to take her away from us?". They don't have anyone to answer for. They simply go to the hospital after nine months. After the labor they go home and the child is theirs, no questions asked. For them the bonding can immediately start taking place.

Speaking of bonding, ours and Penny's keeps growing and growing. Yes, it sometimes involves testing the limits to see how the parents are going to react, just like it does with every child. But, more and more she seems to feel safe with knowing where we set the limits. I haven't heard the demanding to take her back to Udon lately. We did have that period of revisiting the grief. We had been warned by our social worker that those times can crop back up. But, it's all part of the normal grieving process. It's good to know that she is working through it. In fact, the other night she had a dream that she was back in Udon talking on her nanny's phone to her new American cousin. This cousin said that, "No," she did not want to come see Penny because she wanted to go back to South Dakota. Then Penny woke up crying because she realized that soon her cousins are going back to South Dakota.

Yes, the cousins she had never met are finally here. They came out to celebrate Penny's graduation and her birthday (a few days early). And I'm so thankful that they have been getting along so well. At times Penny can seem overbearing and bossy to the younger girls. But, at the same time, they are inseparable. Like my mother explained to them, "Imagine that you had no mommy for years and you lived with 250 other kids. Often you had to help take care of several of the younger ones. You might become a little bossy, too." Yes, sometimes Penny can be a mother hen and doesn't take to mothering, herself. But, it's also sweet how she often calls me, "Mama" and "Mommy" and buries her head into my housecoat when she first gets up in the morning. Even though she sometimes can wear a mask of a tough exterior I appreciate her spunk. And she also has such a sweet, caring, affectionate side that is so quick to give hugs and express love. What a precious daughter! Can't wait until she is officially a Regan!